Jane, Get Me Off This Crazy Thing! – Day XXIII – NaPoWriMo 2014

Through streets of dust
And fields of green
Amidst opposition flags
And skies unseen

We travel on
Hoping against hope
To muster courage
So we can cope

There are smiles and waves
And showers of cheers
That help deflect
The few rare jeers

An innocent face smiles
And blows me a kiss
And it’s moments like that
That’s I may miss

There are grating moments too
People I can’t stand
Who push my last nerve
With their selfish demands

Can I do this or not
I don’t know, I can’t tell
I need a break
I need out of this hell

This is how it is
Stuck between two worlds
Time to get off this roller coaster
Before I go and hurl

In Two Minds – Day XI – NaPoWriMo 2014

I’m so tired
I’m done with this shit

If I’m perfectly honest
I’m enjoying this a bit

When will it be over?
When can I go home?

What an adventure!
Wonder where tomorrow I’ll roam

Too much tea
I can’t take it any more

Let’s do another day’s worth
Let’s do four!

If I hear another complaint
I think I will explode

I’m so happy to help
And lighten their load

Just grin and bear it
And soon it will done

It’s going to be brilliant
Once this race is won

Alright, enough
Now I go and hide

Open up those curtains
Let the sunshine inside

Aren’t we done yet
With all this crap

Nighty night, sweet dreams
I guess that’s a wrap

Between Acts

All the world’s a stage,
And all the men and women merely players:
They have their exits and their entrances;
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages. At first the infant,
Mewling and puking in the nurse’s arms.
And then the whining school-boy, with his satchel
And shining morning face, creeping like snail
Unwillingly to school. And then the lover,
Sighing like furnace, with a woeful ballad
Made to his mistress’ eyebrow. Then a soldier,
Full of strange oaths and bearded like the pard,
Jealous in honour, sudden and quick in quarrel,
Seeking the bubble reputation
Even in the cannon’s mouth.

This is where the words of the immortal bard end and mine begin. For I am unsure that I have yet to progress to the next act.

In life I have played many roles – the lover and the villain, the vagabond and the general, the joker and the martyr, the dutiful son and the argumentative brother, the protector and the destroyer. But facades fade and in time I find myself confronted with the same visage in the mirror. Hated and cherished all at once.

These past few years have been spent searching for meaning and place in this life. For direction and position. It is a struggle that many encounter. When the exuberance of youth begins to ebb and the desire flares for the wisdom of ages spent to begin to show. For the seas of life to part and the path to the next phase to present itself.

This is where I find myself caught in the quagmire of self doubt and unending questions. I look to plans of the future to guide me, unsure that I have chosen the right path.

Like others before me I have erred. But find myself hard pressed to scorn faults of my youth. For each mistake has brought me to this moment now. And if I am happy, is it not all for worth? Are past glories not sufficient to tide over the swell of mistakes, forgiven but not forgotten?

But the question remains. Where to go from here. Forward – resilient in the face of trepidation and terror? Or to face behind – attempting to correct grievous error and make whole heart torn asunder?

Or is at simple as saying TO BE CONTINUED…

Can’t See Straight

My eyes can’t focus
My patience wears paper thin
And the lack of depth perception
Is really getting under my skin

Every expert disagrees
With what the last one said
All I want to do Is bash in my own head

Trying to keep calm
So much easier said than done
Sitting trying to study
In the park under the sun

I’m driving myself crazy
Hell its what I do best
“Maybe you’re going cock-eyed”
Someone said to me in jest

So much pressure, so much stress
All I want is peace of mind
Is something wrong with me?
Or am I just losing my mind?